Why is it so Hard?

Why is it so hard, to wake up after sleeping for hours? Why is it so hard, to take care of myself daily? Why is it so hard, to stop overwhelming thoughts? Why is it so hard, to just eat a bit every single day? Why is it so hard, to head out alone without panicking all the time? Why is it so hard, to stay focused and motivated? Why is it so hard, to start a conversation with someone? Why is it so hard, to fit in with people at school? Why is it so hard, to find a meaning in anything I do? Why is it so hard, to not question things I say? Why is it so hard, to not overthink my next move? Why is it so hard, to stay calm and collected? Why is it so hard, to fall asleep at night? Why is it so hard, to open up and ask for help? Why is it so hard, to express my emotions without having to force it? Why is it so hard, to make friends, but so easy to lose them? Why is it so hard, to stay awake? Why is it so hard, to not think back and regret every single damn thing I did wrong in my life? Why is it so hard, to please people? Why is it so hard, to make my loved ones proud? Why is it so hard, to stay alive? Why the hell is living so hard? Why?