Why?

Why? That's all I want to know. Why do I always bite cheek to stop tears? Why do I always look in the mirror and see my biggest fears? Why do I cry every time I see my own reflection? Why is it that every time I eat my body has an objection? Why is it that I'm not good enough? Why do I always have to be "tough"? Why can't I be pretty, cute, skinny... perfect? Why am I always the child that's wrecked? Why is there always something wrong with me? Why is it that the flaws are the only thing I see? I don't like me. Why can't people see? I don't want this. This doesn't go away with an apology and a kiss I don't want to be alive I don't want to strive I don't want to be here I don't want you near I want to be gone I don't want my smile to always be a clip on I don't want to be a second choice I want to say it but I can't find my voice. Why? That's all I want to know.