why?

coursing feelings, my heart is crushing, it really feels like you don't know the meaning of the words I'm saying, and a faulty, worn sedative won't sedate me. my mind is racing, there's so much to do and you just want me to sit here and waste my life? my time here is precious, but why? why can't I live forever? I love to live, I'd hate to give it up. Why? why do you put these thoughts in my head? these meaningless thoughts, they do something to me too, you know? it's not just about venting anymore, it's about reflection, caring. Care for me, would you? before what's at the end, if the end is even an ending.