Which Way To Go

Everyday I'm reminded of what life has taken from me. At times it's blinded me. I could not see one step in front of me. I could not navigate the life that God gave me. I need help! I'm at rock bottom and it's time for me to seek myself. And in spite of myself, I rise up from the wreckage. And oh did I mention? Being an addict sets me back too! On top of everything else, most days I'm searching around looking for something to help. I try not to be blue or melancholy. To say the least I long for the past . What a release. I'm aimlessly wandering eaking my way through life. I still have my pride. I'll try to rise up even for spite. With nothing to live for nor nothing to gain, I can't go on living life this way. God help me! Show me my steps. I don't know how many years I have left. I'm on a downward spiral. All down hill! But in my heart I have more fear. Fear of the unknown. But I'm trying to find ways to survive. I should thank God I'm alive. But why is that not enough? Now it's time for me to release the beast! I will not give up. Lord show me! Your will is now my own. I just need a purpose. I can't live if it's all in vain. Forgive me God, I pray in your name. I just assume live if it's all the same.