Used to believe

At first, I thought I'd give it a shot. What do I have to lose. Over the years, I learned hope is nothing but a ruse. You can hope someone gets better for them to just die. Leaving you alone to sit there and wonder why. You can hope someone does well, but when they fail and they take their life. You wonder if you could have done something to help them survive. You can hope that if you change for a girl, it'll all work out. Trying to make it work with all your might just for her to mess about. No matter how hard I try, hope isn't on my side. In the end, I am always denied. My heart can't take any more. It's been shattered too many times before. So I sit and hide locked away. Sitting in darkness with my dismay.