unhealed wounds

ever since i was a child i compartmentalized my heart and put it in a box somewhere along the road i was taught to lock my emotions away in a tower and never let them see the light of day and that hurt worse than surviving it would years later i still lick the open wounds that were never allowed to heal years later i am fighting tooth and nail to be able to feel my emotions that my mind is so determined to lock away and every time i am hurting i am grasping feelings like sand in the hands watching it slip away to a corner where i'll never be allowed to feel it again