u fell for me

You fell in love with me at my ugliest— chipped nails, dirty bare feet, and really big teeth. You fell for the real me, the girl who didn’t stare in mirrors for hours picking herself apart. You loved me before I started starving myself, before I stuffed my bra, before I learned how to hate my own reflection. You fell for the real me— the version of me that felt free, the version that never felt judged. You never made me feel like I wasn’t good enough, smart enough, or pretty enough. You never made me compare myself to other girls. I never doubted that you loved me. I was never scared of losing you. With you, I felt the safest. And I still don’t know why I chose chaos instead of you. We were just kids when we met, so stupid, arguing over dumb things, fighting half the time. But when it was only us, the world seemed to stop. There was peace with you. We’d laugh until our stomachs hurt, tell each other things we could never tell our parents, and for a little while it felt like nothing bad could touch us. I’ve always had butterflies with you, even when I swore I was over you. I thought we’d always just be two kids with a crush. I never thought it would become something real. an