two sides of the same coin

I never realized how close love and hate actually are until I met you. Until I loved you so deeply, and was forced to watch you walk away like I meant nothing, and how angry it made me to realize how bad you treated me, and how frustrating it was to still love you despite it. I wanted to kiss you, but I also wanted to punch you. I wanted to be there for you, but I also wanted you to suffer alone. I wanted to hear your voice, but it also made me angry every time you spoke to me. I wanted to hold you close, but I also wanted you as far away as possible. how can I love you so passionately but hate you so brutally all at the same time? -a.n.