toothbrush

your toothbrush is still in my bathroom. Now when I see it I remember. When I had to shrink so you dared speak to me. When you left me because it was all my fault. again. When love was to much to give because I dared speaking too. When I wanted to disappear because my very existence was suffocating. I also remember When making love felt like the only way to be loved. When you pressured me to do it. When you stopped asking for my consent. When you raised your voice when mine could only whisper I'm sorry. If I hadn't left would you have raised your hand too? Would my skin have bruised after experiencing your oh so gentle touch? And would you have brought chocolate the next day and told me to forget about it? I still have the chocolate from the first time you came back. I'll probably throw them out now but I'll keep the toothbrush. To remind me to never let you in ever again.