to be loved and not fixed

Was i hard to love ? did i feel like another burden ? if so , would you leave ? or would you stay and ask what happened would you notice the puddles on the floor and ask where they came from would you ask why my arms turned purple and red why my voice got lost somewhere between " im fine," and " dont leave." would you, too, leave me alone to fight this silent war or would you carry the sword when it feels heavier than my pain , even when it's forged with the love i gave and was never given , by the sweet nothings i whispered as i drowned in the dark where you let go of my hand would you feel burdened by the way, i love by the way, i search for you in every empty room by the hope that you won't see through this mask by the weight of my fears will you, too, let the last thing i see be your back or will you hold me above the deep end and tell me, " im here , it's okay ."