The Circle part 1

Finally the circle comes to an end. But it depends on the day. I get the same question all the time are you okay? Honestly I just want to stand in the middle of a roadway and take a guess on which car will be my death ride. I'm supposed to have pride in myself. People think I'm selfless. All I can say thank you when I just think I'm worthless. I'm just gonna continue getting hurt. You're going to keep throwing me in the dirt. I need to back away. You keep trying to make things go your way but no matter what you say. I'm losing feelings. I warned you this would happen. Yet here we are, I'm finding you slackin. The other day I kept telling myself. I won't do this today because after I do it the whole world seems grey. But then you touched me and it felt like my body was frozen solid. My vision went spotted. Every part of me wanted to push you away and I did but you just thought I was joking. I don't feel like provoking you. But I'll still fight it with my actions. You started holding me down making things go your way. I could feel the tears burning in my eyes. I tried to disguise the breakdown coming. I was running to the bathroom at this point. Just take a deep breath is what I tell myself.