thanx, E

it just doesn't seem fair. like, AT ALL, for me. why do YOU get to decide when WE need a break or to go no contact? why do YOU get to fuck off and do whatever your stone cold heart desires while I'M left behind to pick up the pieces? why am i the only one who seems to be going through heartbreak, is blocked, ignored, and deleted, while an old best friend of mine gets to speak with you? EVERYONE gets to speak to you except the one person you ghosted, ME. so, am i just not allowed to have feelings of resentment? feelings of jealousy? feelings of abandonment? am i just not allowed to feel? because this... whatever the fuck this may be... is not what i want. i want to talk to someone without the fear in the back of my head of that person ghosting me when things are going great or we hit one lil bump in the road. i want to love someone with all i got to give, show em i mean fuckin business, and i want that feeling reciprocated without having to ask and/or beg for attention. i want to be the only person you're interested in. the only person you have eyes for, even while were over 1500 miles apart. i just wanna love someone as much as they love me, flaws and all. cause lemme tell ya, this is lonely AF. 💔💔💔