talent of yearning

it felt great seeing other people get their talents passed down from their elders, while i yearned to make my family feel proud of me, they got their talents because they earned it. While i got mine because i wanted compliments from them, to feel like I'm worth a bit. Now, I'm jealous of them. They didn't beg, or looked like they wanted attention from their family. I did though, i wanted their love, i wanted to feel honored, but i couldn't grasp it. It felt like i was crushed bit by bits whenever i saw the look of dissapoint and disgust in their eyes. Like i wasn't apart of their family. I still continue to yearn, yearn, and yearn overtime and i won't stop.