Sunfishing (part 1)

1 I do not see, yet I remain aware, A cold, still place where even chaos is fair. I’m not alone who acts to know, I assume those I love are safe somewhere somewhere I am not required to go. 2 I do not ask if they’d stand by this ground, this fear shaves away as silence comes around. 3 I don’t know if I’m required to think, It matters to some what I get, what it brings. Feels like nothing, like I’m the negligent being, I carry imperfections as if they weigh nothing. 4 Does it matter? Perhaps to some, not me. Can God care less for what we share, or steal similarities between that ant and all I feel? A human doesn't care what ants see the ant’s wants what we wouldn't plea. 5 Would the devil find that ant’s appeal, so precise, so cold, such a meekly deal? The ant asks none, devil just believes, it works, persists, does not deceives. 6 This value weighs on none, yet we both strive, we move, we labor, struggle to survive. But only I count gaps, compare, and see the ant lives on, free from disparity. 7 When I speak this way, it sounds like neglect, As if I’ve turned away from what others expect. They plan, they seek, they call their aims true, I again walk with defects as if just passing through.