"Shadows on the bench"

Sittin on the bench.. Counting to ten, Holding my breath, I know it's kinda tense.. But I'm just like everybody else Lost in my mind where I don't belong.. Chasing the moments that never come.. My momma said it's just a phase But my heart's in a race.. Feelin lonely all night.. Got no love cuz, they're all so blind.. Breathing and breathing, Couting and counting.. Why does IT feel like I'm still fighting.. I got the feelin in my bones. All this tension in these Walls.. A reminder of my blood.. On Hands where mysteries flood. Dad! Mom? Can you hear my screams in this hole? I wait for your miracle, for your attention.. And yet I'm still sitting on the bench.. Couting to ten, Trying to believe that you'll stay.. Couting my scars.. But they're not as bright as a sky full of stars, Nor a future I'm reaching out to touch. The wind is so cold.. My mind is not thinking as it's told.. I forgot my name.. it's my curse.. Maybe it could all be worse..