saying I love you

saying I love u is like acid burning my skin for how could say I love you when I don't know what love is I can taste it like poison on my tongue like all the other lies that are so far strung lies of I'm fine and its ok words like love and hate but how could one know the difference when all they have been fed was hate for so many years while being whispered to hearing a man say I love u only to reach into my pants how could I say I love you when the only love I saw between my parents was filled with poison on their tongues and I got this poison from them so I wash my skin in acid for I refuse to be the same but no matter how I try I get so confused by this game