repulsion

I feel so uncomfortable with my being, not because of its beauty, but because I feel like it doesn't belong to me. Sometimes I see it and admire it, I like it. Other times I see it and it horrifies me, I hate it. I don't understand the reason for my repulsion toward the body that keeps me standing. It hurts to be disgusted. There are times when I can't even look at myself. It breaks me to disown myself.