persistent emptiness

I feel like I'm no longer feeling, I feel like I'm no longer living. I've tried writing as a way of letting off steam; at first it seemed to save me, but it ended up killing me. I've let out so much, I've expelled so much pain, that now I'm completely empty. The emptiness hurts more than a knife stuck in my throat. In the end, you learn to live with the constant pain, but how will I learn to live with a persistent emptiness? I don't think I'll accept the feeling of being dead in life. Day after day, feeling nothing. Just an emptiness that was once overflowing with ideas and thoughts, perhaps bad, but they accompanied me. Now I'm someone or not even that. I'm not sure if it's better to be someone empty or not exist at all. Existing to take up space isn't living. I prolong my pain, and I contribute to causing the pain around me. My friends are starting to feel uncomfortable in my presence. They don't understand me, and I understand. My family is starting to hate me, thinking I'm just looking for attention and forgetting about everyone else. I cry to stay alive. I cry at the thought of not going on. I suffer, but the only thing I notice is the suffering my discomfort causes to others.