Now

There’s a reason I stopped smoking this shit crack. Instead of helping me be calm, it turns me into something wack. I always tend to wonder what it is that I lack. When I think of this corrupt world, it makes me want to attack. I’ve lost something, not sure what it is nor where. I’m gazing into the distance, lost in a stare. I was told I’m perfect, yet how can I feel this way? Always running from them, unable to fight and stay. Gone again, for the thousandth time like before. Imagining that he’ll return to knock on my door. I thought I could do it, living without him. If I let him back,does that mean that he wins? Attempting to kill me one whisper at a time. Yearning for the days that you could call me ‘‘mine’’. Can’t we go back to that day to rewind? The less we have is a thing called time. The day I heard your voice was something I should try to erase. I’m sure I’d be a happier person if this were the case. Don’t look at me now, I don’t want you to see my face. Let’s start at first, not second or third base. One word at a time, I’m almost done destroying. All the while you continue on enjoying. What can I say when I have said it all before? I ask them to stop, but all I get is more.