Never enough

I blame myself for everything, telling myself I should see a therapist. I look at myself, the at my life. I should be embarrassed to even show up. I look at my younger self, the disappointment in their face. I ask myself why, Why did I deserve this? Why did I become like this? I can't explain the way I feel, I wish I was never seen. I'm never enough, look what have I done, I'm slitting my wrist, it's getting rough. I feel numb, isn't that what I want? I'm tryin to eat, but it's just too hard to even breathe. I still feel the pain, cuttin' through my brain.