My writing

I wish I could love my poetry But I can’t I hate it These few broken words scrape my skin They make me bleed again They force me to relive every moment I write about In them I see everytime I wished I bled out instead of being here I see everytime I said "I love you" I see everytime she left I see everytime I sipped from the bottle Trying to drown out the voices instead of myself I can't breathe when I write It's so personal baring a part of my soul onto this wretched paper The record of all my shame and all my failures I see when lessons I wish I had then The worst part us that I'm glad I know I deserve every part of my pain It was all my fault If I wasn't there If I was stronger If I was better But no I wasn't Now I deal with it Shattering my minds and writing with the shards Hoping some other twisted soul can relate Praying that my pain isn't singular That someone else shares my hate My shame So no I can't like my poetry I hate every word I place on these pages