My mind's battle

I awake, opening my eyes sometimes I stare up at my ceiling letting my thoughts flood in tiny little voices gradually evolving in size my mind's absurd audio book throughout my day rulings are made do this do that go here go there my compulsive need torments me my mind's rigid rule book a story, an image flows in often uninvited they never knock or ring my doorbell they never bother to take off their shoes staining my thoughts that lie within my mind my mind's painful picture book accusations, future predictions, lectures I've heard it all but there's no routine stable no outside voice reassuring enough I'm a good person I deserve rest I'm a horrid being I deserve retribution my mind's relentless tug of war but morality was never a true concern to the overwhelming sea of rushing voices