My life's a myth

I've always lived inside my head nothing was true nothing was real I made my myths and I thought I was happy talking to myself I was lonely and I couldn't accept that so I pretended with all my creativity- to look happy at least to myself my whole life, it's been like this I escaped from what's real I ran I didn't know how to face anything I don't even remember what real and what's not now I have too much bad reality to re-imagine as a happy thing- just to process a reaction, A happy reaction, pretending to be strong I never was but because "what if" it happens in real life it's a myth I choose to believe in because I'm scared.