my disease

I can't breathe depression is my disease I suffer from every day without a break I continue to play this game with the other me the one I don't let anyone see the deep dark monsterus one the one always holding the gun pointing to my head part of me wishes I was dead so I wouldnt have to deal with this just float away into the abyss so I can finerlly relax but nothing can fix these cracks that scarred my heart untill it shattered apart piece by piece was sharp and dead now I live in this endless dread and self hatred a new sadness I created to always live with forever it won't make it better but things can't get worse because there is no reverse to undo this curse that I'm always stuck with happiness is a myth forever and always