my daily thoughts.

I lay here all alone wondering why why did it go this way what is so wrong with me, that I deserve this pain with every breath I take i wonder which one will be my last I think about the everlasting peace I will feel if I just let myself go. I have to find one thing each day to live for but I wonder what's gonna happen the day I can't find one. I could honestly say I have nothing and no one. fuck I don't even have myself at this point I don't know who I am. I don't remember what it feels like to feel content or what it feels like to trust. I just want to feel okay again.