mothers day.

A phrase said to every women on that day. .just checking out buying a card for another and without a thought happy mothers day. smiling politely thanks. The moment I reach the car I cannot stop the tears because I will never be a mom. surrounded by those welcoming little ones screaming at toddlers complaining about how hard thier children are all while I sit in slience, I am fine. crying in the darkness because an emergency surgery and an empty house is all I get. my mom saying I know it's hard I was gonna get you a card the words don't come only I'm a great aunt. so easily forgotten when they invite you to the zoo , a baby shower or simply outing that I striggle in the slience because an im sorry is so not what I want. my therapist ask how my week went and we talk about my sick friend cause my soul is so tired ill simply break if I open the gate . so I close the door of the closet to the onesie they will never wear. tags attached and in the dark for the sadness stays there.