Mortality

Every day passes away, I'm left again today wondering, how many sunrises have i missed? how many days will end before with the suns warm kiss, before i pass away? fleeting eternity, counting the seconds, dreading the hours, I am told I've grown, yet i feel the same, my mind is unstable, life feels like a fable, moments flip the table, when will i have to live more than i have left to live? when will my life involve hearing of others' deaths that are as young as me? smiling till it hurts, laying in the dirt, smiles are preferred, but crying is okay, what's a little rainy weather on my last important day?