mind

I want my mind to be silent It's running laps and I am in capable of catching up Falling behind, exhausted,  Spinning circles, chaos inside Alert attentiveness,  unnecessarily protecting my already safe self. Subconscious contact constantly with my past I want to be present, I want to let go and just be My own mind internally attacking me My mind is strong, it's also misleading I say I will be okay it counters me Any calamity felt dissipates  Is this who I am forever, will I change The defects of my mind are not always needed yet so present Unwanted maladaptive protection fades away And I can think clearly, I can be here in the now Present, quiteness