Maybe I should have....

This phrase that proceeds all my greatest regrets,these words that keep cycling in my head ignoring all my threads and ruining my mind's rest Maybe I should have slept less, for 3 hours was not enough to study and pass, maybe I should have changed school for my environment may have been too bad Those everlasting maybes are the way my soul found solace, they are the only reason I'm still moving, being sad and suffering is nothing compared to regret, they don't affect the way you see yourself, they don't make you wish you were someone else, they don't make you engulf yourself into self hate so much so that you forget what made you this way I don't wish to die, but i don't want to live, so yes I sleep, yes I try to evade this terrible dream, being a failure is one thing but seeing that you don't see what went wrong is another, it means you will always do the same mistakes and thus always feel the same way I wish I could sleep for ever, escape from this nightmare now my reality, I feel like experiencing a reverse nightmare where I am waking up into the disdainful truth I know my family is trying to understand but hear "that's not so Bad "makes me wanna grow mad, after all the time and health I sacrificed.