Love

What if my silence writes the ending for me? what if my hesitation is the theif in the room? someone else could step into the pause I leave, see he's the way i see him, with that ache in the chest that feels like prayer. i imagine he's eyes catching someone else's, the way they catch mine in my dreams. he's laughter spilling into another pair of hands, hands that aren't trembling like mine, hands that aren't trembling a confession in the dark. it's cruel how timing plays favorites, how love waits for no one but still demands patience, how the smallest second can turn into forever for him, and not for me. i tell myself chances circle back, but sometimes they don't, sometimes they land on someone's braver, and he looks at them, the way I've been begging the universe he might look at me. and still pretend it doesn't burn, when i imagine he's smile sealed to another face, when he's name is written in someone's else's mouth, when every dream I carried becomes just a story, he'll never know i told. because if one day he walks down the aisle, draped in white, radiant with joy not mine, i won't lie. My chest will break like glass. The best day of he's life will be the worst day of mine, a cathedral of happine