Lost like Alice

How nightmare turned into reality How now the downs are more than normal From happy to scared to mad to sad From feelings to disconnection Am I healed because I'm less aware Have I recovered just because I seem happier? As lost as Alice and as mad as the matter I have accepted the loss of myself Let the madness in and let yourself go The only option I can bear the traps set from life Now what else will come? Even I am excited for my doom, when will it happen, how is it going to end ? Just forgive me for my foolishness. From imagination and hallucinations to loosing touch with reality and everything else I can't form a thought, can't form a personality that is truly my own The biggest apology I owe to is myself