Long Thoughts

I need a hand to hold, I need the company of thee unheld, I need you but your gone, I died along with the fog, Like a mist but gone wrong, I dont know how to hold on, Everything I owned is gone, Everything I loved was just a dream, Everything I want is not as it seems, I just want some peace, But your up in my head clouding me, Its like im in a day dream daily, But im still fully awake, Yea im up here making bank, Everytime im high up with the money i feel so low, Everytime i have everything i feel so cold, Everytime i have you i felt you are gone, Then i blink, And then your gone, Im not sure how to move on, Everything in life is like a pond, It gets so full then its empty, I get so full of this pitty, I wish you were just with me, But its so hard to remember these memories, Im not sure how but they got to me, All these possibilities, Like what if i died would i see you? If i died is there a heaven and hell that id have to choose too? If im gone would i still be able to miss you? I dont know but it seems all like a joke, I dont know which way to go, Your hand is gone no hand to hold, I feel so cold all alone, This is my final stroke before i go, Goodbye world, Had a nice home.