little hope

Now that I know what will happen to me if I continue acting the same way, will I change? Or will I continue behaving the same way? I don't know what to believe or what I will do. I can't find the strength to sustain myself, to give myself the life I deserve, to care for the living part that lives within me. I am aware of the effects I am having on my mind and body. I must stop and begin to react decisively, to seek the happiness I so long for. I just need to find the strength to do it. I have little hope left for my future behaviors.