Life

Life is hard, and depressing and all I keep doing is fucking stressing. I can't sleep at night so I'm tired all day long and everyone's mad when I try to tell them what's wrong. I've never been an open book, I've learned to keep all my feelings tucked inside this crook. I've been taught that my feelings don't matter and when I talk it's just a chatter. Sometimes I wish this would just end 'cause everyone thinks I play pretend. I've been hurt too many times now all I do is write it out into rhymes. I'm tired of feeling used i am mentally abused. I hate myself I hate my body everyone makes me feel gaudy-i see a group of girls and I feel insecure and when they talk it's never sincere. I can't tell people what's wrong so I write it out into a song, and if I show them my song I'm always wrong. You're always telling me how I feel and then tell me to go eat a meal-you don't know how hard it is to live this way and before you say it, yes I pray I know God's here and he won't ever leave me but sometimes I wonder where is he?