Just Me

I am simply trying to leave the old me. Why do people always expect me to be something I am not? I've always been treated like shit, the pain in my heart unfolds into rage, my rage is held inside alone with my anxiety, depression, stress, sadness and more, I've given my all and people treat me as if I am not human, is it possible I might just be something I am not? I feel like everything I do isn't enough, am I just not enough for anyone? I am never truly happy unless I'm with my favorite person, he makes me so happy and so secure, everything he says is perfect and just him alone is perfect, why do I have siblings like this? I hate them with all my heart, I loved them so much and it seems they don't care, so why should I? it doesn't make sense to me, one day I'm happy and just being myself till everyone is all up on me breathing down my neck, I hate myself and when I tell my mom about ut because she wants to know why i am the way I am, she blames me not my siblings, me. I just want to be me but even then, I will never feel the same about any of my siblings.