it's time to let go

why do we dodge each other? if not an act of service to the other. you know that I seeing you will deture my mind, loose my senses and my focus purely on you. On the mistakes I've made toward you. Then I have been cruel, hoping you'll see me and feel. So I could feel. We both can't feel that love again, its gone, it disappeared like nothing happened to us. but I know, and so do you. you can't look at me and not remember. so looking for you is my punishment and searching for you is my crime, this act of hate for myself. I scearch you out but once you dodged me, I understood. so no remorse, remembrance, sadness shall continue to linger on. these are the words I must remember by. but once I stop seeking you out, you find me again. then the cycle repeats. the feelings of regret, guilt, lust all appear before our brains. but you are not the one for me, no, I know now. though our time was short, it was powerful, to me at least. we are going separate ways and we cannot intertwine paths because that is not the way we are going or the way we want for ourselves. so this is my second goodbye. it will be hard, but it is needed. my friends can hear me groan and moan over you but my longing is tiring.