it's the exact same

sometimes I don't even recognize myself anymore am I a person or a monster who's searching for redemption? I feel like a stranger walking on this rotten skin I curse myself for being this shitty attempt of a person do I even have the right to be mad at the people who act just like I do? I don't. I wanna change this I will change this I can't conform myself to something less than I deserve and I hate the most all the pain I cause around me just to be aware of all the wrong I'm doing so spit on my face, tell me that I'm wrong enough I'm already crying in my knees cause you even had the decency to say it calmly I hate myself I can't keep on like this I don't wanna be like them I can't be like them I swore myself I'll be different...