IN MY THOUGHTS

Many would say it's okay not to be okay. Not everyday you get to see the sunrise or the sunset. well maybe one day on your last breath survival can come into play. Imagine not knowing how to say I love you in the Mid's of dying or on life support . Imagine calling for help and there's no one there to help you . Many would ask how does it feel to fall without falling ? Does love really exist ? How will I make myself happy if my. family wasn't happy ? Would it be fair if you came first and I came last ? Was my life on the verge of ending when it's now starting ? Will I be satisfy even if I fail to succeed in one thing ? What if I say music was my only company to save me from thinking of my funeral . Would it be fair since I didn't get to say my darkest secrets or thoughts ? Trying to cope when I know there's nothing to save me from this darkness. Many day's and nights I keep wondering what if I wasn't meant to be for her ? Will I be okay physically or emotionally ? I'm running but don't know where I'm running to . Will I ever get to see another day when my pain will be taken away ? Will I ever be saved from this darkness ? Alone I fear for myself . Not knowing who to trust , who to love , or who to keep .