Impatient Faith

I would consider myself a patient woman, With children, with elderly, and with special needs. I consider myself patient with my animals, With my family, With my boyfriend and friends. I consider myself patient to everyone, And they'll all agree. Yet I do not consider myself patient with Myself. I rush myself and leave no room to breathe, I refuse imperfection because I know I Could be better. I yell and scream when I can't find the Words to explain my emotions. But one thing I'll likely never be patient with Is my faith. The Catholic guilt of loving a woman tears At my soul like knives, And the dreams of sin follow like shadows. My prayers echo through the walls of the Church, Loud enough to wear even the play yard Could hear me. A patience prayer, and a love prayer. Two can't go hand for hand, Nor love for lust. The impatient faith in myself, religion, soul Is the biggest flaw that I can't fix