I WISH

I wish I was better. I wish I was stronger. I wish that my hands were steady, and that my breaths were longer. I wish I was healthy. I wish I was youthful. I wish my skin wasn't so pale, and that I was more useful. I wish I glowed with life. I wish I made you happy. I wish I could say this out loud, without stuttering or sounding sappy. I wish I made you smile. I wish you wanted to be nice to me. I wish you liked being near me, and that you wanted to spend your life with me. I wish I was enough. I wish I was better. I wish that everything could be fixed, with just the contents of this letter. I wish I was the girl, that you thought I was, back when I made you smile, and you gave me a buzz. You deny it but I can see, that you need someone strong, and I can't make myself healthy, though I have wished it for so long. I wish that I was everything, that you needed me to be. I wish that wishes came true, and that you were in love with me. I wish I was stronger. I wish I was better. I wish that everything could be fixed, with just the contents of this letter. ~ Rachel G. Ezell ©rachelezell28