I ruin people and myself

Tapeworms burrowing in my ears telling me that there's no good to find I feel the Worms eating holes through my mind Disturbed regrets that will kill me in time distant faces burning holes through my chest haunting me in my mind I feel Its time for me to Rest To sleep endlessly to let go of the fragments of myself I keep to show. what if I just take a peek Beyond the veil of who I am behind the veil of who I can Endeavor to be sometimes when I think and I can see it so I see myself In just a temporary glimpse And then it goes I miss who I was or who I thought I was And now I've muddied up myself and my reflection I need to kill myself so I can Adorn my resurrection But now im Beyond repair my life is a horror movie only lives to scare I Lose Myself I'm that of a rat digging holes for myself living in the walls I hear what they say about me talking makes my skin crawl I cry and cry Hoping someone will hear me hoping someone will help me hoping someone will save me for my feelings twisted and deranged I see the little girl now has changed they turn away in disgust my bones have become rust tightly wound like a marionette being controlled by your pathetic attempts to be something you are not A person