I Miss My Friend

So it happened her birthday was yesterday and I even texted it to her "don't spazz or nun but happy birthday 🎉" it was brief but I miss my friend I can't miss the person who she once was or the relationship we once had but I miss the laughter, the smile, her smile at that why am I the one missing if she did me wrong huh? it should be the other way around right? i know for a fact she won't do the same for me when July hits but shit I can't say it doesn't hurt that I miss the times I wanted to say "I miss my lil shi" my partner in crime my friend and the fact I used to call you "mine" now that's definitely in the grave trust but, my heart wants friendship and my mind is saying no so I don't genuinely know where I need to go can't lie it stings a bit knowing she would never think of me like this but at this point life happens, I can't dwell on the past no matter how much it hurts, I'm trying to grow and revert kinda hard when the plant that caused you to wilt Is still thriving with no remorse of how you felt, damn these are some shitty cards I was dealt