I hate tears

I hate them with all my gut the saltiness of them is horrid they make me physically sick to the core of my gut I keep them in as long as possible but then at night when everyone's sleeping they hit the only nerve and I don't like it I hate when I realise I need them I hate when they fall off my face mostly I hate how the sit in my eyes it makes me feel like a big mistake but all I can do is wait for the tears to shed upon my heart for in eyes I've used a disguise I hat e how they are there in the middle of the night but I'm glad they are because I struggle to shed them in the light