I AM SORRY

Looking back at the day he talked to me like never before. His words cut as deep as the Mariana Trench. I could feel his anger and tiredness toward me— even through his texts. That day we were supposed to meet. But I bailed. I bailed out on him, as always. And when he tried to reach me, I cut him off. So of course, I understand his frustration. I always do this. I always bail on him at the last minute. At first, I agree. But when the time comes, I’m nowhere to be found— just like shadows at noon. It’s not that I like giving excuses. It’s not that. It’s just that— that is the truth. I’m not like every other girl. I’m not allowed to go out, hang out with friends, even just walk around the neighborhood— I can’t do that. If I could, you know I would. And for that, I am sorry. I AM SORRY. I know that every time I say I am sorry, you think I’m pretending. But the truth is— I’m not. Every time I say it to you, I mean it. So I am sorry I do not have that freedom to go out every day. I am sorry. So please— please, don’t get tired of me. Don’t leave me. Just simply don’t abandon me. I love you, and only you. You are what my heart desires.