hushed

I knew him before I knew him All American, hard working family man People tipped their hats to him on the street Little did I know what lay beneath the decit. I can't help but see his eyes when I close mine. the rig he used as a tool to control the terms of abuse welts and abscesses purposely punctured while in his eyes the glaze of enjoyment glittered I knew something was off when I felt I needed him to know I wasn't interested I knew things went wrong when my legs buckled beneath me every moment of that day replayed I shouldn't have stayed I should have fought harder my voice said no but drugs in my veins made my body hotter When he was done He asked" is it totally bad that the more said no the more I enjoyed taking it?" Why did I say No? why'd I act like it was ok my response can't be washed away just like the events of that day. I've been slowly dieing ever since. hoping that the drugs will take away his eyes when I close mine