how I feel

Yes I want to live but not like this. I don’t want to be treated or hurt by others. All my problems are not fixed on my own. Sometimes I need help solves my problems. I keep saying I love myself when people talk about me because I hate word I hear from others and I still care about myself. Sometimes I just want to hide my pain or my feelings about some things others because I have different opinion then others. Sometimes in moments I feel unspeakable or unaware and unsafe in life. This pain will rests in my hands until I die. Sometimes I struggle thinking things in my mind. Leaving problems not fixed not able to control myself from the devil when I am mad. Ignore people when I am mad for no reason. Some people do not notice or understand how much pain us people go throw in our struggles. We try to fixes or change what going on in real world but sometimes it is hard to fixes yourself or change yourself. You want to look or feel the bad side of you or one another.