Hopes

What do I hope for in this life? To be alive and happy or to be myself trapped A poem I'd call it but it only rants I'm tired of this cycle repeating over and over again, And to pretend that I'm used to it when I can't be. Those words hurt but I have to pretend that it's nothing. It's called being "strong" they say but if this is what it is then I'd rather die weak. Those insults, those looks, all those "jokes" made me feel crooked. I'd love to just disappear but I have to "hope" That the better days are just yet to come I can't survive any longer knowing I'm nothing but a bother and I can't trust people's words even if they tell me that I'm really a charmer I know it sounds like I'm seeking attention when I'm really not. I'm seeking peace, happiness and people to call mine. And therefore I ask, What do I hope for in this life?