he hurt me

I know he hurt me but what if it didn't happen what if me being touched by you was just a dream what if I lied and that's why they didn't do anything about it what if i just got scared and wanted to say something to give me attention what if that day I dreamed you took me to the woods to kill me what if it didn't happen and I'm scared for no reason so why am I grieving if it wasn't real what if I did lie or what if I did dream it why do I still have flashbacks if it didn't happen my body tells me it happened but my mind tells me it was just a dream I'm scared that it was just a dream and my side of The story was just a lie why am I scared for my life maybe it just didn't happen and I hallucinated it maybe I dreamed It I could have lied but my body knows it happened but I could have dreamed it