hard to love

I'm no fool to the fact that for most I'm entirely too much I take up alot of space and loving me is the furthest from easy See for me things have never been simple or kind, I've never known a love I didn't have to earn As long as I can remember I've been working overtime just hoping to finally earn my place as somebody's someone I gave so much of myself away to people that never intended on giving any love back Putting everyone else's needs wants and dreams before my own, constantly shrinking myself so that my light never shines any brighter than theirs But that's not really love at all is it? Is it?? I really don't know, I don't think I've ever known what it means to truly be loved like really really loved and maybe thats because I am too much or maybe im just not enough, Im too emotional or too detached, always either manic or clinically depressed and the truth is you'll never really know what youll get with me but I promise that even tho I've never known the love of another I know that the love I have to give is the purest most genuine love and love like that is hard to find I'm no fool to the fact that for most I'll forever be too much I take up too much space and I'm hard to love But that's ok...