Gray Shade

I sometimes lose myself I'm sometimes carried away by my sorrows and afflictions Mama says I'm pretty Daddy says I'm his princess But the state of my soul cannot be satisfied by the positive energy around me The silence in my soul is the loudest noice I hear that torments every bright side of me I fear I may lose my mind I put a huge smile on my face all in the name of acting brave and courageous around many When I fall, whose gonna be there to lift me up when I do all the liftings I'm taught to love my self unconditionally with zero tolerance for disrespect, humiliation, negative energy, and one-sided relationship  But the moment I share my love it crumbles down to pain, hate and anger The sun rises each morning with a brand new significance, A brand new joy Birds chirping as usual But my state remains the same as yesterday There isn't color  in  my life anymore All that's there is the gray Shade.